That night
by Yuta
Summary: A strange vignette featuring very, very slight ZADR. Suicide. Death. Might get better if I get enough reviews. Angsty, wich is all i am able to write. Don´t bug about spelling!


Warnings: language. Very, very slight ZADR, provably a prequel to future stuff, if this piece of trash is accepted. Angst. Sadness. Crying GIR. BEWARE!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them, You know who they belong to, witch is quite good, cuz I am too lazy to write it down.  
  
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++  
  
"Wake up, stink-beast." Those were the first words he directed me that night.  
  
That night.  
  
I don't remember it too well, not that it matters very much now. Just some of the stuff that happened and won't leave me alone. Always remembering the same bizarre situation over and over and over and over again.  
  
I have nightmares, you know?  
  
.....  
  
Of course you do, little sister. You are the one that awakens me from them. Thank you. I really am..... grateful.  
  
Please, don't get so concerned about me. You scare me when you are like this....All are concerned, in a way or another. I have all the attention. But I don't want it. No-one noticed the 15-year old big-headed freak three weeks ago.  
  
Everyone notices me now.  
  
Dad is now seriously thinking in taking me to the crazy house, the kids in skool have been scared of me since I split open Torque's head in the rage- fit, and miss Bitters has apparently developed a particularly liking to me. She thinks I've passed the normal state of doom-ness a child my age -or hers, for the matter- can hold. Is she ever so proud, you should see her.  
  
What were we talking about? Oh yeah, that night. It wasn't so long ago, you know? Only three weeks...  
  
Oh, no GIR, please, don't cry.... Zim wouldn't have wanted you to cry.... Gaz... help me here, please...  
  
...There. Better. I don't want him to listen to this anyway. Thank you for landing him your discman.  
  
"Wake up, stink-beast." He said. And so I did.  
  
His eyes, Gaz. It was the scariest thing I've ever seen. Remember when we were around six years old and you got one of dad's old lab coats on, the hat and that sword to scare me?  
  
No?  
  
I remember.  
  
I had just finished a brainfreezie and come out of the room and the lights wouldn't come on, and then a thunder illuminated the whole house and I saw you. It was horrible, Gaz. You were over the chair and looked so tall, and I couldn't see anything of you but your smile.. Remember now, how scared I was? Too scared to even scream.  
  
Just like that night.  
  
He was directly on top of me, two of his spider legs over my bed, just a few inches away from me, the other two in the floor. His eyes barely inches of my face, burning, a dark red. I've never seem them so dark.  
  
So close, Gaz, so close I didn't needed my glasses to focus on them.  
  
Then I felt it, the laser against my head.  
  
I wanted to scream. I really did. Not insult him, as you might think, I was really scared. Just to scream. Somebody to come and help me, to save me from the mad alien.  
  
He never was sane in the first place, but I'd never seen him this mad, Gaz. Never. And I guess that besides GIR, I was the one that knew him better. The only one that ever saw him, you might say.  
  
The next thing I knew was that he had slammed my glasses in my eyes, the rest of the room coming to focus, and my eyes got fixed in the watch. 2:30 Am.  
  
Funny how time suddenly becomes important when something like this happens, don't you think so?  
  
Anyway, he got up, packed his spider legs and simply stood. I was sitting in the bed, too shocked to move, just staring at him like an idiot. With my glasses on I realized how tired he looked. No. Not tired.  
  
I don't know.. He looked..... I think he looked a bit like dad, after mum left us..  
  
He just stared at me. He sat Indian-style in the floor and fucking -stared- at me, not saying anything his antennas flat against his skull stirring every now and then, tapping the laser against his chin in a thoughtful manner.  
  
"What do you want from me?" asked he suddenly. I didn't answered, not knowing what was he talking about.  
  
He sighed and dropped his eyes, playing idly with the laser.  
  
"I know you just use me. Play with me. Why?" he stared at me. God's.... Gaz, it was like he was drugged. I'm not pretty sure he wasn't, the way he talked.. And his eyes. Opaque and dark.  
  
"What do you mean with that?" I asked., still not moving from my spot in the bed.  
  
"Don't play your mental tricks with me, Dib." Said he staring up at me.  
  
"But I don't know-"  
  
"Liar." Whispered he, glaring at me coldly with heavy lidded eyes. It was like talking to a kid, Gaz, the tone, the accusation in it...  
  
He got up and stared down at me.  
  
"You don't care.And I didn't, either. Never cared... Until..." he said, and stopped there, just staring at me. After an eternity, he continued " I know you only use me, as they did. So.. I wouldn't.. b-bother.." that came out more like sob than an accusation. It still hurt. He was about to start crying, and I couldn't understand why.  
  
"I think I knew it." Said he suddenly, the antennae rising slightly and a soft smile appearing in his lips. "But I didn't cared. I just needed a reason to keep going. And there you were. It really wasn't about conquering earth after a while."  
  
"Then what?" I snapped at him. He wasn't making any sense... yet... I think I had a pretty clear idea of what had happened.  
  
He continued as if he hadn't heard me. "It was about being better than you. It was about doing something and wait for you to un-do it. Constant defiance. You always were up to my expectations." He closed his eyes and his antennae's dropped again, his arms lax at his sides.  
  
I took the chance, some control in my sense regained, now that he was being passive, and tackled him. You know how lithe and thin he is, so it wasn't that hard. Once I had the laser in my hands, I felt better. It didn't lasted very much, really. Just until I stared at him.  
  
I was there, panting, wearing the old oversized black shirt with the demon- smiley face you gave me from X-mas and the gray baggy pants I use for sleep, panting, half-exited and half-scared. And he stared up at me. So calmly. He didn't cared.  
  
"Of course, I wasn't. Not to them." said he. He got up once more and continued, head lowered, staring down. "I never was good enough. They said they gave me chances. But they didn't. They sent me here to die, you know?"  
  
"Your leaders?" I asked.  
  
"My tallest." Answered he. "It doesn't matters now, I've been banished forever. There's not turning back. The mission. You too. All a. Lie."  
  
The he started laughing. It was horrible.. but you know that too. That was what woke you up.  
  
Maybe if you had come right to my room then.  
  
Maybe if GIR hadn't started pounding the front door right then.  
  
Maybe.  
  
But that didn't happened. He suddenly stared at me and I noticed GIR´s pounding to the door and screaming for his master not to leave him. And then I thought:  
  
"It's a nightmare."  
  
But it wasn't. And I knew it. So when he started walking, approaching me, I just pointed at him with the laser in my shaking hands and stumbling back boards. I couldn't shoot him. I know I've claimed that I wanted him in an operation table, to see him dead. But I never really thought that it would imply me KILLING him. And he kept talking all the way.  
  
"I don't know if I really care anyway. I was the stupid. Me, the denial. Nice story we have. All my life: denial and failure. Sometimes. I did realized what had happened. And then.Like now. I am nothing." By then I had my back pressed against the wall, and his chest was pressed against the laser end. "If I continue like this, my life will have no meaning or destiny."  
  
I don't remember what I was thinking right then. But it was among the lines of "This CAN kill him"  
  
I barely could hear you, out of the door, when you and GIR started banging at it. He just took the laser off my relaxed hands, I barely noticed it, until I saw it in his hands.  
  
He turned around and showed my computer desk against the door, just as you opened it, and I saw GIR, with the lower half of his body missing.  
  
"What did you do?" I whispered. Damn it, Zim LOVED that stupid robot. He would often curse his luck in having a stupid ADVANCED SIR unit, but he always ended up spoiling the little green-dog. I couldn't believe he had hurt him.  
  
"He tried to stop me." Was his simple answer, the calm demeanor back. "He is not as stupid as we all had thought. It's not as bad as you think. Easily fixed. Now." he said. And pointed at me.  
  
I slid to the floor and closed my eyes shut, hiding my head in my arms. I just didn't wanted to see him as he killed me.  
  
"I won't be used anymore. Not by you, and certainly not by them." Then he... He kissed me. He kissed me in the forehead and stepped away.  
  
"Bye, Dib-human." Said he. And then shoot.  
  
I don't remember very well what happened next. I shrieked and I might have fainted. You said I was conscious when you came in the room, but I don't remember. Everything is a blur. The first thing I DO remember is you asking me where to put the body. By then you had already fixed the room quite nicely, excepting for the computer, witch was broken. You had already handed GIR to dad, telling him it was new GS2 amplification and you wanted him to fix it. I still don't know where did you hid Zim, because he wasn't in the room when I came back to my senses.  
  
"He is dead." You said, pointing at a dark spot in the gray carpet. His blood..."Where do I put the body."  
  
"The body." I repeated mindlessly.  
  
You just stared at me, your eyes open, and it just -HIT- me, Gaz. He was dead. Not like you and me, thinking, breathing. It had just stopped. And then I remember I started crying.  
  
"He can't be dead." I said. "I NEED him!" but he was. And there was nothing me, you, or GIR could do about it. I couldn't handle it. I went hysterics, until you left and the next week passed in a haze. The second was even worst, because I was snapped to reality once again. And by Torque, no-less.  
  
So tell me now, Gaz. What did you do with Zim's body?  
  
The stasis camera in the unused lab? Why did you do that?  
  
Oh.  
  
....Thank you, little sister.  
  
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++  
  
End.  
  
Kay, do you like it? Do you hate it? Do you at least understand it? This was my first IZ fic, so be gentle. It's an idea that refused to get out of my head. Do you like it? If I get at least 7 reviews (positive ones) I can make a sequel. Only if you want. And as a bonus, if asked, I can put a small vignette telling how did Dib nearly-killed Torque. ^__^ I hope you are at least pleased with this. 


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